whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
