Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize