I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
