Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
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