How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
