guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize