Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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