do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
