Just mADE A PArabola og urine
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize