i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
i would one night stand the shit outta him
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
There r osticjed everywhere
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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