Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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