im drinking this country out of the recession.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
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