i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
