can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
