As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
