When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
