I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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