I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
