i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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