Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I am available for nakedness
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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