So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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