I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
