I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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