ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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