I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Randomize
