he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
