My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
