But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
