He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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