I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
He? As in you personified your dick?
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
