So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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