can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
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