How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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