Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
