Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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