You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize