I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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