Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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