Why are handjobs necessary in class?
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
