I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
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