this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
