found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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