Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
You may now shotgun with the bride
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize