Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
We named our party play list daddy issues
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
