they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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