Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
