Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
