I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
