I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
