dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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